Since I talk so much about Sweden I decided to explain my background and how I came to live in the far north near Gällivare, Sweden. Then you will have a better understanding of where my perspectives come from.
I was born and raised in Southern California. My mom’s side of the family has predominantly British and Swedish ancestry, but she has always been particularly drawn to the Swedish side. Obsessed is a better term for her, and I don’t know why she has this obsession.
When I was about eight years old my mom started taking me to Vasa Order of America meetings in Palm Springs, CA, close to where we lived. Vasa Order of America is an organization that was founded by Swedes who had immigrated to America and is over 100 years old. There are chapters across the US, as well as districts.
My mom took me to Swedish events such as Santa Lucia, Julmarknad (Christmas market) and Midsummer. I was even in a Midsummer Queen beauty pageant. We went to Vasa Park in Los Angeles, as well as Scandinavian restaurants and stores all over Southern California. Of course we visited IKEA many times.
One day in 2002 when I was a freshman in high school she asked me if I would like to go to a Swedish language camp in Minnesota. Of course I said yes. Why wouldn’t I want to get out of the house during the summer and go somewhere new?
The camp was called Sjölunden and was located in Bemidji, Minnesota. I packed my bag and boarded a plane to Minneapolis and then took a bus with fellow campers directly to the camp in Bemidji.
I loved this camp! The counselors were welcoming and energetic. They spoke Swedish from morning until night, only speaking English if they absolutely had to. I learned the Swedish language in a classroom setting, and also learned a great deal about Swedish culture, music, food, history, etc. I ended up going to Sjölunden for four summers and developed a foundation of the Swedish language there.
During my final summer at camp a counselor asked, “Who wants to actually go to Sweden?” Right away I was like, “Me!” As you can imagine, I had grown up around Swedish American culture all of my life, so to actually go to Sweden was like a dream come true.
The counselor discussed foreign exchange programs as an opportunity to travel to Sweden. She mentioned Rotary International Youth Exchange as the most affordable foreign exchange program, so immediately I decided to go with Rotary because my family did not have much money.
Once I arrived home in California I got in contact with Rotary and quickly received information about the foreign exchange program. I filled out an application, was accepted, did some fundraising and then was set for my trip. I registered for a 10 month stay which was the maximum time length available.
The reason why Rotary is a more affordable exchange program is partly because students do not choose which city they stay in. Rotary decides where the student stays. So I received a letter stating I would be living in Älmhult, Sweden. I did a quick Google search on Älmhult and learned it is the headquarters for IKEA, so I assumed it is probably a busy city with things to do despite having a relatively small population.
Finally, in July of 2006, I was on a plane flying to Sweden. I was so excited to be living abroad and questioned if I would prefer Sweden to be my new home? I really was optimistic about the experience.
Then I arrived to Sweden. I will cover my experience as a foreign exchange student in another blog. But for now I will say that Sweden was much different from what I had anticipated. Perhaps it is because camp gave an image of Sweden as being a fun and exciting country which ended up not being the actual reality for me.
Long story short, while Älmhult was calm and peaceful, I found myself feeling lonely pretty early on during my stay there. I did not feel very welcome at school and had a hard time learning about sports and activities in the area. I overall felt disconnected and out of touch with the community.
I had a few friends who were mainly students interested in American culture, but otherwise I felt like I received a cold shoulder from most students at the high school I attended. I would go to Rotary meetings because I was obligated to since I was the guest exchange student and no one would talk to me. Not even my Rotary “mentor” that was assigned to me reached out. So the feeling of loneliness hung around the whole time which was difficult to manage.
After four months I felt ready to return to California, but I stayed for the whole 10 months since that was what I had committed to.
Once I arrived back to California I said I would never return to Sweden again. I felt much more content in the US.
So how did I end up back in Sweden? Fast forward to 2012 or so, I was running a livestream show on a streaming platform where I had viewers from all over the world. One of the viewers who reached out to me was from the far north of Sweden, so of course we immediately clicked since I was so familiar with Sweden.
We ended up talking for years on the net. He eventually invited me to go on a four week trip to Thailand and I accepted the offer. We got along during the trip and enjoyed our time together. Then he visited me in the US, and then.. Even though I said I wouldn’t.. I actually returned to Sweden, this time to visit him.
I will admit that while I did like him a lot, there was this glaring dilemma that I did not like the country he lived in. For a while I told him I didn’t want to live in Sweden and told him to find another girl, but as my life clock ticked on and I went on a number of failed dates, it became clear that he was probably the best person for me. We did actually have many similar interests and got along fairly well.
Additionally he had his whole life set up in Sweden. He had a career, a house, a car. Meanwhile in California I was working part time jobs and was not living in a home. I could not see myself asking him to leave his work and house to move to the US to be with me just to learn if we simply get along. So I decided to take the plunge and move to Sweden thinking that if we did get along then we would move to the US after a couple years.
HAHA! I really thought moving back to the US would be that simple. Man was I wrong. I actually read an article some time back that discussed how it is common for people who move abroad for a relationship to think they will return to their home country with their partner. However, returning to their home country often does not occur because life happens, which has been the case for me.
When I say “life happens,” I mean that I became pregnant in 2019. Note, it was a “happy surprise.” At that point I became more focused on staying because we had everything set up to care for our baby comfortably and securely, such as a house, income, etc. Then came two more pregnancies, one was a twin pregnancy, so I have stayed put simply because there is security while I care for my children.
At this point I have been living in Sweden for 10 years and am thinking it will probably be a few more years before relocating to US, if that ever does actually happen. At this point I can just say that planning can be difficult when you don’t know what life will throw at you.
So my connection with Sweden is bittersweet but nonetheless it is a major part of my life, especially now when my own children are Swedish.
You are welcome to view a video I produced discussing this topic which was uploaded to Youtube October 20, 2026.